Warm weather is hurting me 5.7.19

Warm weather is hurting me 5.7.19

I’m not doing so well in this warm weather. I was so wrecked yesterday from a long doctor appointment, the weather and my class, I didn’t have time to write in here!

I feel like such a Debbie Downer that I’m not thrilled about the warm weather.

Not being able to eat hardly anything as a former culinary person is one kind of hell.

Being trapped indoors on beautiful days is a whole other level of torture.

Climate change is definitely going to be tough on a lot of medically fragile and elderly. Our systems can’t always handle the heat.

I’ve been giving myself daily IV saline bags (sometimes with amino acids and vitamins) since May of 2017. I’ve noticed my need for more and more saline has gone up, slowly over the past two years.

During the winter last year, I NEVER needed more than one bag. This winter, I gave myself two bags per day quite a bit.

There is a drug

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I like feeling really strong 4.28.19

I like feeling really strong 4.28.19

I wear an extra small now.

I loathe even writing that.

It’s weird to have something that so many people want so badly - or think they want - and to hate it.

I opened this Athleta catalogue - I’m not sure how I even started receiving it since I never shop there - but I like looking through the workout clothes. I’ve got to let go of the past and give away - no THROW AWAY, they are sooooo old - my old workout clothes. The pants literally slide off my hips now! What the fuck!? I’ve had hips since I was 16 and no amount of healthy eating or workouts has changed that.

Until now.

Now that “society” is finally embracing super strong looking women like the ones in this photo - and women of color woot! - I’m turning into this frail little lady. ARRRRGGGGHHHH! It’s like seeing gluten-free waffle cones at a vegan ice cream place - all the foods I love and can eat are EVERYWHERE and I can NOT EAT THEM.

My timing sucks.

As I’ve mentioned in here before, I’ve never aspired to be waif-y thin. I’m trying to remember when my ideas around that started forming. I feel really lucky I didn’t obsess about my body shape much when I was young.

I was WAY more concerned with

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