I wear an extra small now.
I loathe even writing that.
It’s weird to have something that so many people want so badly - or think they want - and to hate it.
I opened this Athleta catalogue - I’m not sure how I even started receiving it since I never shop there - but I like looking through the workout clothes. I’ve got to let go of the past and give away - no THROW AWAY, they are sooooo old - my old workout clothes. The pants literally slide off my hips now! What the fuck!? I’ve had hips since I was 16 and no amount of healthy eating or workouts has changed that.
Now that “society” is finally embracing super strong looking women like the ones in this photo - and women of color woot! - I’m turning into this frail little lady. ARRRRGGGGHHHH! It’s like seeing gluten-free waffle cones at a vegan ice cream place - all the foods I love and can eat are EVERYWHERE and I can NOT EAT THEM.
My timing sucks.
As I’ve mentioned in here before, I’ve never aspired to be waif-y thin. I’m trying to remember when my ideas around that started forming. I feel really lucky I didn’t obsess about my body shape much when I was young.
I was WAY more concerned withRead More